where my pd peeps at?

Today was one of those days that I will look back upon, as being one of the most important days of my career.  I have a horrible, terrible case with an innocent client facing life in prison and it feels like I might not sleep for the next few years.  Only a real pd knows this misery.  Right now I need to huddle up with my public defender community, arms on shoulders, pull our heads together, talk it out, yell it out, scream it out, cry it out, march together, fight together, win together.  If I could invite all of you over, we would eat pizza and drink beer and wine and definitely something stronger, whiskey sounds good, and when it was all over I'd feel ok, I'd have a plan, I'd feel stronger having had you here to support me.

new book on why the system sucks

Has anyone read the book "Ordinary Injustice" by Amy Bach?  I'm uncertain whether I'd like to - I already hear enough of what a hack I am.  I'm not sure that I disagree with her premise - I guess I'd have to read the book to find out.  Any PDs out there going to wade through it?

goings on

I won but not the way I should have or wanted to.  So I didn't feel good about the win, because it didn't feel right, although I think in the end I should have won for the right reasons.  There were many reasons I should have won, those just weren't the right ones.  How crappy is that?  I get a win and can't be happy about it, on principle.  But I suppose my opponent now knows a bit what it feels like to be a P.D. - to be on the losing side for the wrong reasons.

I am applying for jobs, more for geographical purposes than anything else.  This is a huge deal.  I do not feel ready for change, only because I'm scared.  I'm afraid that I'll end up without a job somehow, or that I'll feel as though I've made a terrible decision, or that I'm making decisions that bring me no closer to the right path.  I am totally and completely afraid.  Also, I am dismayed how many people want my law school transcripts or want me to write an essay about what life experiences I have that make me a good public defender.  Um, well, I am a public defender.  I've been a PD for 4 years.  I found that to be very good preparation for being a public defender.  I thought it would be easier to make a lateral move - but it's the exact same process, 4 yrs later.

to those about to rock [1L year]

I noticed a spike in visitors, and noticed that there was a significant number of people searching for advice on being a 1L. 

I wrote this over 4 years ago for those entering law school [yikes!] and it's a good thing I wrote it then, because I don't remember what it felt like to be a law student as much anymore.

Good luck to all entering those hallowed halls.  Just remember, you're worthy.

on being a public defender

I have exactly, precisely, $10.92 to last me the next 8 days.

Dear ABA Law Journal

Thank you for your emails to me as a blawger.  It's nice of you to write me things of interest.  What I want you to know is that there is very little you do that is of interest to me.  Your monthly magazine, your website, all those things are about and geared towards a very specific subset of lawyers; namely, the big firm - corp counsel types.  Our profession is so much broader than that, and you perpetuate this narrowing of the profession that begins with law school.

So about this Rebel project you have going on?  Thanks for letting me know, I'll be sure to check on it, but I'm already disappointed.  Your rebel is a corp counsel who doesn't hire firms if they have a poor track record regarding diversity.  That's commendable.  It's not rebellious. 

Thanks for continuing to marginalize attorneys working in the public interest.  Neither you nor my clients see me as a real lawyer.

even the annoying ones

I just noticed that he wore the same shirt on the past three court dates.

He drives me absolutely insane, but he wore his nice shirt.  Because he probably has only one.

He tap dances on my last nerve, but I'm so proud? humbled? pleased? to be his lawyer.  I'm glad that something pushed through the barrier of my annoyance and tapped me on the shoulder to remind me that yeah, he's a huge pain in the ass, but he's a human being who has a lot of life battles, and I'm so glad that I could stand by him.  Because the prosecutor with the shiny shoes and the judge with his season tickets and the detective with his nice suit and badge will come in, and I get to be the only one privileged enough to fight for the guy with only one nice shirt.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for letting me be your lawyer. 

I only have one nice suit.